


Just Smile Back

by scandalpants



Category: Veronica Mars (TV)
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Past Child Abuse, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-04
Updated: 2014-10-04
Packaged: 2018-02-19 19:36:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2400338
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scandalpants/pseuds/scandalpants
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>October 3, 2003. Written for VMficrecs May prompt, to write a tragic scene from a POV we didn't get to see.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Just Smile Back

**Author's Note:**

  * For [nevertothethird](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nevertothethird/gifts).



_And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn_

_Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice_

_Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling_

_And I didn't feel a thing, So baby don't feel no pain_

_~Eminem_

 

_**October 3, 2003** _

_**7:26am** _

_Fingers digging into her hip. Muscles bunching under her hand with each thrust. Pressure, delicious, building. Head thrown back, teeth raking her collarbone. The coarse strands of hair tingling her palm as she pulls his head up. She needs his mouth on hers as she…_

"No!" Lilly jerked awake. _Damn. Logan._

The dream, she was sure, started off with Russell Crowe throwing her on a bed. Sex followed, of course – the raw kind, savage and fun. Then Logan had to interrupt with that smile, and those eyes that went all dark and caring whenever he was inside her. Like it meant so much more than it should for anybody at fifteen.

She tamped down the fluttering in her stomach at the thought. Right now she was too mad at Logan to even let him into her dreams - not after that Yolanda incident. People fuck around, it happens. She'd done it enough; although never at a party in front of all their friends. Unless they were broken up at the time.

Lilly sighed and studied the ceiling, wrapping the end of a lock of hair around her finger. _Maybe I should let him go. File him as a first love and find someone less... intense._

In ten, maybe fifteen years, she'd be ready for something more serious. Pity any woman Logan was involved with then. They better step aside, or learn what it meant to be between Lilly Kane and something she wants.

Except…no. Logan was hers, now, and she intended to keep him; he'd just have to toughen up a bit. They all did – look at Duncan and Veronica. Duncan dumped her without an explanation, the chickenshit, and Veronica just took it. The girl didn't even push when she figured out Lilly knew why.

The three of them had to learn that if someone served you up a platter of crap, you served it right back. It was already in play, anyway. No point in stopping things. Logan would spend the weekend in Mexico, then come back to find out his girlfriend went much farther than an illicit kiss.

Lilly grinned, imagining the blowout to follow that little bombshell. _Drama-rama_. They'd be the talk of the school for weeks, and the makeup sex would be… _shit, don't go there, girl._

Her interrupted dream came back to her; that look in Logan's eyes shooting a twinge to her conscience.

She knew what he wanted – love and fidelity and all that crap. The first, easy. Logan was completely loveable. The second…well, everyone cheated. Logan _(bastard)_ had proved that.

What she could do was stop fooling around with any of the Neptune high boys. No loss. Other than Logan, the high school boys just didn't bring it. She should know – she'd given enough of them a chance.

Only Weevil ever came close.

Weevil with those bovine eyes that followed her everywhere; his thick fingered, calloused hands that knew just when to be rough. They could have had something if he didn't go and fall in love with her.

_Stop it. You know the rule, girl. All yesterday gets to see is the shake o' your ass. Speaking of which…_

Jumping out of bed, she landed in front of the full-length mirror just as her radio alarm went off, as if she'd planned it. Which, of course, she did.

A slow, sensual rap had her moving in a way that would make Veronica blush. The morning sun coming in the window provided the ideal background light, making her pale skin and blond hair glow.

Giving a practiced, seductive smile to the mirror, she scanned the image from her graceful neck down to large, perfect breasts. Onto a firm stomach and the groomed strip of hair at the apex of her thighs; she lifted the hair off her neck and worked her hips side to side.

_Damn, girl. No wonder they all pant after you._

The gasp behind Lilly didn't surprise her. Celeste never did learn how to knock, and since she assumed a closed door didn't apply to her, Lilly never bothered shutting it. These little shows may or may not be on purpose. Lilly would never tell.

"Come on in, Mom. I'll teach you how to drop it low," she offered, demonstrating.

Marching over to the alarm clock, Celeste's hand slapped down and hit the off button. "Lillian Kane. Must you insist on traipsing around this house naked? What if I had been Duncan?"

"Why? Worried I'll horn in on that Oedipal complex he has going?"

Lilly didn't know why she expected a reaction from that - Celeste could give lessons in stoicism to Secret Service agents. Or she had perfected her ability not to hear anything unpleasant, especially from her daughter. The woman was a fucking Ice Queen.

"You're just lucky Duncan's already gone to a student council breakfast." Celeste crossed her arms and took a deep breath. "After that he has a dentist appointment and plans with Casey before soccer. Your father and I will also be gone most of the day. And you have, what, that cheerleading carwash at nine?"

Lilly took a sharp breath and blew it out her nose. _Pep Squad, at ten. I told you three times_. "Yep."

"What time is it over?"

 _Five o'clock, like on the flyer I gave you_. As if Celeste would let amateurs touch her precious Mercedes. "Depends on how many guys are lined up to see me in a wet t-shirt."

Celeste's neck tightened, the only sign she even heard. "We should all be back here between six-thirty and seven. I made eight o'clock dinner reservations at The Henry. I expect you to be dressed." Her eyes moved up and down Lilly's naked form, stopping briefly at the hickey on the side of her breast, "appropriately."

Lilly snorted and went to her dresser to take out the green and white uniform. "Get real, Mother. It's Friday night, and not even a real school day. I'm going out."

"I'm sure whatever activities you have planned for the evening can wait until after dinner. Or do we need to discuss credit card privileges again?"

_Fine. But just for that I'm totally buying that leather halter for when the grandparents come over._

"Whatever," Lilly shrugged. "Now, do you want to get out of my room or watch me practice hip rolls?" That finally warranted at least a huff of annoyance from mommy dearest before she left, slamming the door behind her.

Just enough time for a shower and a quick errand; she'd make it to the car wash in plenty of time.

_**8:46am** _

Warned no one ever answered the door at the frat house, Lilly didn't even bother knocking. Like last time, the place reeked of boy sweat and stale beer. Four guys, three cute and one that looked like Kevin Smith, were passed out on the floor. A fifth had a piece of pizza hanging out of his mouth, his hands busy with a game controller.

At his glance Lilly asked, "Quinn?" and received a head nod toward the ceiling. Her back faced pizza boy as she walked up the stairs, but it was a given those shadowed eyes follow her the whole way. No hangover kept a frat boy from ogling, so she put an extra swing in her hips.

The door was solid, a hard wood of some sort, marked by years of fists bangs and the residue of old stickers. One single, faded red and white decal remained. It read IN- N-OUT on the top line and URGE on the bottom one, since the B and R were cut off.

_Boys._

Lilly had been here once before, but left after a hot make out session and a lame excuse about curfew. No way would Quinn get full access to these sacred grounds until she'd at least been to a party. And had her witness lined up.

Except when he opened the door shirtless, _damn_ did she have to rethink that. Broad shoulders, chiseled abs, ice blue eyes and a lecherous grin that did things to her.

No way was the Ice Queen going to hear about this little affair. Quinn was not only Anglo, monied and pretty, he was also smart enough to win that coveted internship at her dad's company. Celeste would arrange their marriage from his credentials alone.

"Hey, gorgeous," he said, eyeing her up and down. "You're early."

"Yeah, well, don't get used to it. I just have somewhere more important to be this morning." Putting a hand on his chest, she pushed him into the room and closed the door behind her.

He faux sulked and captured the hand before she could pull it away, keeping it pressed against those hard pecs. "Where's the love, baby?"

Lilly gave her best bored expression. "You haven't earned it yet."

Quinn shuffle-walked them to the bed, pulling her down with him when his knees hit the edge. Falling onto his back and leaving her astride him, he pulled her down for a deep kiss. One that had her toes curling, even if he did use too much tongue. "How about now?"

"Mmm. The boy shows some promise."

He placed his hands at the button catch for her shorts. "I'll show you a lot more than that."

She pinned his hands down, laughing. Though tempted _(damn dream got me revved up)_ , no way was she going to let a little errant lust mess with her timeline. "Someone's in a hurry."

"No," he cocked an eyebrow at her. "I'm just not in high school anymore."

 _Whoa. I don't guilt-fuck anybody._ "Well then, either college girls are huge sluts, or you don't treat them like booty calls." Even Lilly could hear the challenge in her voice, something that made her sit up straighter in pride.

Quinn's hands reached back to cradle his head as he studied her. "So she wants a date, huh? How about this? We're doing this live band, kegger party tomorrow night. Interested?"

She gave him a teasing smile. _Score one, Lilly_. "I could probably be persuaded. On one condition, though."

Quinn laughed. "I think that's your response to everything."

"Wow. You college boys learn fast."

Placing his hands at her hips, he lifted and adjusted her slightly. "Fast enough to want to know this condition before I agree to it."

"I'm bringing my friend, and she needs a date." Veronica's presence was key; the blonde Jiminy Cricket would force Lilly to 'confess' her sins to Logan, and serve as corroborating witness.

Quinn's hands slid up to work their way under her shirt; thumbs stroked the base of her breasts, just under the bra. "Any friend of yours," he drawled, sitting up to run his teeth over her earlobe.

"Hang on," Lilly cautioned, grabbing him by the jaw and rocking back so she could shoot him a warning look. "She's a lamb, and I'm not bringing her to slaughter. She needs someone who will show her a good time without trying to get her up to a room."

Quinn lifted an eyebrow, studying her as if he thought she was kidding. "You mean like an actual date? Someone to fetch punch, dance, and laugh at her jokes?"

"Exactly."

"At a frat party."

"Well, if you can't manage it—," Lilly sighed, making a point of grinding down before she moved to get off his lap.

He wrapped his arm around her waist, to tow her in for a sloppy kiss that heated up just enough for her pelvis to seek friction. Pulling back for a bit of air, he chuckled. "Fine. I'll get one of the pledges to do it, and threaten him with his life if he crosses a line with her. How's that sound?"

In answer she shoved her hand down the elastic waistband of his field shorts, giving a squeeze of approval. And to check for size. These things mattered. The surprise was on her, though, when she found herself flat on her back, Quinn's weight pressing down on her. A thrill went through her at the force behind it.

_Mmm. College boys._

The phone in her pocket went off, the vibration felt between the two of them as their bodies pressed together. Pulling it out, Quinn squinted at the display. "Logan? Who's Logan?" he asked, a hard edge to his voice that, admittedly, she found exciting.

Lilly blinked innocently, tamping down the small flutter of shame that tried to surface. Really she was doing this for Logan as much as for herself. Things would go much smoother once he learned what would happen if he crossed her. "Friend. Probably looking for my brother. Where were we?"

Quinn's expression was hard, and something dark lurked under it. Something that sent a delicious shiver up her spine. "You told me you didn't have a boyfriend."

"I don't." Not really, at the moment. She and Logan were broken up for the five hundredth of what would probably be thousands of times.

"Good," Quinn scooted down and put himself eye-level with her navel. "Because I don't share. My last girlfriend fucked around on me. I didn't like it." He undid the button on her shorts and pulled down the zipper. Lilly allowed it, since the moment called for a little acquiescing.

 _Last_ girlfriend _? Sweet boy, you are delusional if you think that's what this is._

Lilly propped her arms behind her head to better look at him. "Aw, poor you. Maybe you weren't keeping her satisfied."

Was she challenging Quinn to prove his worth? Sure, why not? Maybe they didn't have to wait until tomorrow for everything. As long as she kept her top on today and the lights off tomorrow night, _damn Aaron Echolls and his hickey_ , this should work out fine.

The way he yanked her shorts off was a tad too rough for her tastes, at least until they got to know each other better. As were the hard hands that pressed her thighs open. "Hey! Take it easy."

"How about," he lowered his head and nipped at her pubis, then took his tongue and circled her clit. "you let me know when it gets too rough."

The guy was like most; probably learned his technique from pornos. Unfortunately what played well for the cameras didn't work that well in real life – too much licking, and the coarse clit action. It generally took a few weeks under her tutelage for them to learn finesse, and how to read body signs.

 _I miss Logan_ , she thought, somewhere around the third time she had to admonish Quinn to be gentle. Logan would have her screaming his name by now, and look sorry if he thought he hurt her. Not irritated. Or borderline angry.

As much as she hated the fact, it was thoughts of Logan that finally got her off. Imagining the way he'd say, "I love you, Lils", and the soft look he always gave her after she came. Only a little cocky, not like Quinn who's smug smile made her want to slap him.

Lilly shook it off as she pushed Quinn away with a joke and got dressed. He was a means to an end, and a yummy treat to look at in the meantime. Very jealousy-inducing, if Logan decided to look him up.

She'd make sure, when they had sex during the frat party, that it was good. Have the boy lay back, ride him like a tool, and not let him up until she was satisfied. He'd have a good time regardless, so tomorrow would be all about her

Lilly smiled to herself as she started the car. Actually, most of the time it was about her.

_**10:15am** _

Parking her car, she checked her phone - no message. Good deal; she didn't want to hear Logan's voice right now, all thick and emotional like he got whenever they were fighting. He should be drunk in Mexico and making bad decisions, not calling her to whine about his barely-kiss with that bitch Yolanda.

She checked in the mirror to make sure her hair was smooth and gloss properly reapplied. A practiced smile bounced back at her, with no hint of the rare flutter of remorse in her belly.

_That's right. Smile, Lilly Kane. Everything's going your way._

Running over to grab a towel, she joined Veronica and helped dry off the car she was working on. With a swing to her hips, Lilly leaned into the work, showing off her ass to anybody that watched. It's wasn't like people really came to these things to get their car washed.

"God, Lilly. I see the Prozac's working," Veronica snarked.

Tomorrow night she and Veronica would hit their first frat party; no one else in their group had managed that yet. Lilly felt the sauce of intrigue spread through her limbs and across her face. She leaned in, close. "High on life, Veronica Mars. I've got a secret. A good one."

_And a few others I'll never defile that innocent brain of yours with._

On the other side of the car a couple of girls stalled in their work, obviously eavesdropping. It was tempting to flaunt the invite to a frat party where Madison and the other blabbermouths would overhear. Except they'd be on the phone to Logan in a second, and her scheme would be ruined.

Unfortunately, before Lilly could suggest she and Veronica go somewhere to talk, that bitchy Pep Squad leader, Miss Camel Toe, interrupted.

"Girls. Less talk. More scrub."

Giving Veronica a pointed look, Lilly promised, "Later," and got to work.

_**5:03pm** _

Veronica's dad picked her up early, so "Later" got pushed back to tomorrow morning. After throwing her wet towel in the heap, Lilly ran toward her car. One more thing on her schedule before the compulsory family dinner, and then she was free for the night. As usual, she'd forgotten to lock the car doors, but her purse was still on the floor.

As well as a couple of new items on the passenger seat. She frowned at the 'Baked in Ensenada' shot glass.

 _Logan._ She'd have known it was him even without the folded notebook paper with the loopy 'L' scrawled across it. A quick skim of the letter's contents showed it was his usual heart bleeding shtick: They were over. He loved her. He always would. Yada yada.

Today the tone seemed a little different, but she wasn't in the mood to figure out why. She had a date with _The_ Aaron Echolls.

_Logan's dad._

If she were anyone else she would swear the reason her stomach flopped just then was from guilt, which made twice in one day. But Lilly didn't do guilt. Life was just too damn short, especially when you had one of People's Sexiest Men waiting for you. No, that rush going through her body was pure thrill.

And really, it didn't matter that Logan got back in town early. When he was being all maudlin the last place he wanted to be was home.

_**5:25pm** _

The pool house was empty - not a surprise since she showed up five minutes early. Aaron Echolls timed sex like a business meeting. Lilly kicked off her sandals and flopped onto the bed. Let her mind wander over the past few days.

It wasn't like she planned on seducing Aaron Echolls, it just kind of happened. A little flirting in retribution for Logan's carelessness last weekend. At first it was a challenge to see how far she could take it, then the buzz of conquest. Sex hadn't given her this much of an adrenaline rush in a while, but even that was wearing off.

What started as a lark turned into some that wasn't worth the risk of getting caught; this time would probably be the last.

The clock showed 5:30. Aaron had to be around somewhere. A breeze fluttered one of the curtains, the panel printed with Logan's face. She snorted, _Well, there's one thing Celeste has going for her – taste._

"Come here, lover. Time to earn your keep," she called, forcing an enthusiasm she suddenly didn't feel into her voice.

_Bored. Come on, Aaron. Let's do this._

Falling back, she idly stared at the ceiling. Mrs. Navarro was definitely better at cleaning than their maids. The Echolls fan never seemed to get dusty, whereas the one in her pool house always had fuzzy gray streak on each edge. Not that the Ice Queen noticed, since she never ended up on her back in that room.

This fan was a little different than theirs. Four blades instead of five. Dark instead of white. A weird circle in the middle. A flat white cord that ran along the ceiling.

Like she'd seen at her dad's building with all the computers and various technical gadgets.

Like security cameras.

_No way._

Getting off the bed and looking around, she spotted another lens, also pointed at the bed. Her eyes followed the white cord on the ceiling to a cabinet in the wall. A cabinet that, when opened, housed a television and video recorder.

In a drawer she found two tapes, both dated for the other times she and Aaron met in here this past week. Her smile spread, slow and treacherous, though her blood started pumping deliciously.

_Naughty boy. You wanna play that way?_

The tape in the player ejected, she shoved it into the empty case and grabbed the other ones. Whatever gods intervened to make Aaron late today probably wouldn't smile down on her much longer, so she had to haul ass. Running out the door, she only barely remembered to grab her sandals.

She hit the gas so hard she may have left a skid mark in the Echolls driveway; the gate scarcely missed scraping the car since she was too impatient to wait for it to fully open. Exhilarated, she rolled down all the windows and cranked the music. The wind whipped through the car, throwing around her hair and making her feel like she was sailing.

_This was going to be. So. Much. Fun._

Lilly had a moment of misgiving when Logan's letter flew out the window, but she'd read enough. A red light or two later, she made it home without anyone tailgating her. Still running high, she hit the brakes a little too hard and the shot glass fell to the floor.

 _I'll find it later,_ she thought, as she grabbed the tapes and ran for the house _._

_**6:12pm** _

Lilly secured the recordings in her air vent _(thanks for the tip, Lo)_ , grabbed a magazine, some lotion, and went to soak up the last of the Vitamin D on offer today. She knew Aaron wouldn't be far behind and wanted a stage wherein she came across as relaxed as possible.

Especially when her parents showed up and found her having a lover's tiff with a grown man. Celeste was going to Lose. Her. Shit.

She didn't have to wait long - within minutes Aaron stomped across the yard. It was almost too bad her parents weren't around to force him to act polite so she could tease him.

"You goddam little bitch!"

Flushed completely red, with sweat beading his brow and upper lip, all signs of the suave Hollywood charmer had gone. This was too good. Lilly jumped to her feet and threw her arms wide. "My, my, Mr. Echolls. What brings you here?"

"Where are the tapes, Lilly?"

"Why? Are you so old your memory is going bad?" She sighed in sympathy. "Aw. Is that why you taped us, 'cause you couldn't remember?"

Aaron's hands shot out and grabbed her shoulders, shaking them so hard her teeth knocked together. "Just tell me where they are. Now, Lilly!"

 _Oh HELL NO._ How _dare_ he touch her like that. She'd thought this would be fun, a little setup of blackmail and/or manipulation. For what she didn't know – she hadn't had time to think that far. But touching her rough like that changed the game.

Shit just got serious.

"Get your hands off me!" She raised her arms and knocked his away.

Aaron shook his head and, with a few deep breaths that made his nostrils flare, forced a calm into his voice. Like she was stupid enough to buy that. "You have no idea what you're doing, Lilly. Those tapes could damage us both."

"Oh ho, nice try. But I think that, considering I'm a child, you're the only one that has to worry."

"Then think about how much they could hurt Logan." The concerned look he affected might be a sell, if she hadn't seen him pull it a hundred times on film.

Lilly laughed bitterly. Since when did Aaron care about Logan? He was just like Celeste – totally disinterested. The missed birthdays, the way Aaron only paid attention when Logan did something wrong. How he fawned over Trina but only had criticism for his son.

_Way to go Lilly. You spent the last week fucking your mom._

She ignored the shudder that ran up her spine. It wasn't the same, and this wasn't about her or the Ice Queen. "Oh, like you care about hurting him? You do it all the time." Lilly ignored the little voice that asked if she was talking to Aaron, or herself.

Aaron grabbed her elbow; this time his fingers dug in deep enough to grind the bones. _Owthatfucking hurt._

He yanked her close, so she had no trouble hearing when his voice dropped low, more threatening than when he yelled. "What goes on between me and my son is none of your business. And unless you want the same," his free hand reached for his belt, "you'll hand over the tapes."

 _What a perv! This is actually turning him on._ "Keep it in your pants, lover. Vocabulary word of the day is 'leverage'. I have it, you don't."

Aaron narrowed his eyes. His face moved in an unsettling few inches closer to hers as he unbuckled his belt and pulled it from the loops. He released her arm so he could match the ends of the belt and smack the rounded end into his palm. The sound made her jump, his threat now clear. Worse, a shimmer of glee formed in his eyes.

_What the fuck?_

"Oh, I don't think that's the case. Where are the tapes, Lilly?"

Lilly did her best to laugh _(c'mon mom and dad, hurry up)._ There was no way Aaron meant what he was implying. The man must be panicking, which meant she was still in control. "Where they'll stay. Until I sell them to the highest bidder."

The belt whipped out, knocking her lotion bottle to the ground. Lilly jumped, then felt her cheeks heat up in embarrassment.

_You're not afraid of anything, remember?_

Aaron doubled-over the belt and slapped it in his palm again and again, his low chuckle creepy and menacing. "You're not going to do that. You know why?"

The belt made red blocks of color in Aaron's palm. Not lasting ones, they each faded after a few seconds. The marks that lasted longest were parallel, made by the edges of the belt.

She'd seen lines like that before, red and straight, crisscrossing each other. Where had she seen them?

"Why?" Lilly stood mesmerized by the _slap slap slap_ sound the belt made in Aaron's palm. The marks coming and going.

"Because then you'll be forcing Logan to choose between us. Logan and I are family." The belt hit his palm extra hard. "Logan will always do what I tell him."

She should be scared. In front of her stood a grown man, threatening to beat her. Her mind, however, was too busy. Synapses firing. Connections being made. The feeling was akin to the time she touched an electric fence, on a dare.

Then it all fell into place, like when she looked at those photograph mosaics. Each individual print was interesting, but didn't mean anything until she stepped back. That's when she saw that together they formed a large, very clear picture.

A picture that said Logan was being hurt. _Her_ Logan. By Aaron.

_OhmygodI'msostupid_

Meg took that babysitting class _(two years ago! Fuck, Lilly)_ and bored her talking about signs of abuse. For some reason a few items from that list lodged themselves in her brain, and arose at the most random of times. _So_ annoying when she spaced on things like her locker combination at least once a week.

Logan never wanted to go home.

Those stunts he pulled _(high risk behavior)_ , the ones she thought he did to impress her.

The way he couldn't fall asleep sometimes, or had bad dreams.

A few seconds passed. Five, ten at the most. Long enough to change Aaron from a handsome, aging movie star into scum. A monster from someone else's nightmare, one that had no hold over her.

_Fucking BASTARD!_

Anger made her breath come in shallow gasps. Anger not just at Aaron, but at herself for not figuring it out sooner. At Duncan because, really, he had to have known. At Lynn for being too drunk to protect her own son. And with the anger, trumping it really, came the never-allowed guilt, enough to make her want to bend over with the weight of it.

 _You_ slept _with him. Let those hands touch you. Hands that-,_ she swallowed back the bile that rose in her throat.

"The cuts on Logan's back. The bruises." Her words came out slow, deliberate, each imbued with the outrage of Adrasteia.

Years of lies flashed through Lilly's mind: Logan saying he'd fallen out of a tree, he'd tripped, or gotten in a fight no one else was around for.

"The cigarette burns." Explained as a game of chicken Logan played with some guy he met surfing, when they were both drunk.

"The broken bones." A cast they all signed, and teased him for falling down the stairs when he tried to sneak in an hour after curfew. Fingers taped together, described as his payback for not watching while his idiot sister accidentally shut them in the door, after he called her a bitch.

"You Fucker. I know what you did!"

More memories. Logan cringing when his dad put his arm around him, or slapped him on the back. Refusing to look Aaron in the eye.

_I didn't know. How did I not know? I made fun of him, called him clumsy. Stupid. An airhead. A jerk. Made him sneak out or stay out too late._

If she had any doubts, Aaron's expression erased them. He didn't look shocked by the accusations, or confused. Just…arrogant. A surety that he had nothing to fear from her. The son-of-a-bitch even smiled.

"The only thing you know is how to spread your legs. Now give me the goddamn tapes."

_God, who am I? What have I done?_

The lying and cheating. The stupid games. It was all so petty and unnecessary. Every bit of it designed to hurt the one person who'd been hurt enough.

 _Not anymore._ _Not by me and not by this piece of shit._

She shook her head, and let her frame fall into what Logan called her bitchstance: feet together, one leg bent at the knee and a hand at her hip. The other arm she threw wide, and forced a laugh at the bastard who actually thought he was scaring her. "Wise up, old man. Leverage, remember? I've got the tapes, which means I get to call the shots now."

The belt stopped it's slapping as Aaron took one step closer to her. "What the hell does that mean?"

"Here's the deal, _lover_." Lilly stepped forward as well, to show him she wasn't afraid. _I'm not I'm not._ "Those tapes are hidden, and well. You keep your hands off Logan, and they'll stay that way. But I see one more mark on him and hello, Access Hollywood!"

He reached out and grabbed a handful of long hair. With an abrupt yank, her knees knocked into the table that held that heavy red ashtray her dad used for his cigars.

"You slutty little cunt," Aaron spat, less than an inch from her face. "You think you can win this?"

Her scalp burning, Lilly cackled, inwardly cringing at how shaky it sounded. It had all worked out. Aaron wouldn't dare leave a mark on her she'd have to explain to her parents. Who'd be home any second.

"Oh, it's won. Best part? I don't have to pretend you're not a lousy lay anymore, Mr. Echolls." Pinching her thumb and forefinger a mere inch apart, she pursed her lips in a pout. "Such a shame."

He suddenly let go, causing her to stumble back a few steps. When Aaron moved forward, this time it was his knees that bumped the table, making the ashtray clatter against the glass tabletop. His hand reached down, but instead of steadying the red dish, he picked it up.

His hand was steady as it rose. The blacks of his eyes dilated, and his mouth morphed into a sneer. The sound that came out of him was primeval, a type of hunter's snarl that fixed her feet to the cool stone of the patio.

It took an hour, a decade for him to raise the dish over his head. Long enough for her to wonder why he'd do such a thing. To match that action to the look on his face, and acquire a glimmer of understand about what it all meant. Then a flash of red went across her vision as he brought the ashtray down.

_OhmygodIthinkhe'sgoingtok—_

**Author's Note:**

> This wouldn't have come together this way, nor on this day, without the inestimable beta powers of nevertothethird. Thank you my friend, for your mad skills and for accommodating my 11th hour epiphanies.


End file.
